Enlightened Shadows

I got up from my desk,
Feeling as If I don't deserve this moment,
I walked to my screen door, feeling hurt.
Baby when your in pain - I'm in pain.
So come in and close the door.
He doesn't know the type of woman you are
Or the way you deserve to be treated.
I hold my feelings back,
And I know I should of been your man
Your lovin a fool, and are as blind as love.
So tell me what's on your mind..
I turn the light off to the world
Because even a puppeteer takes time off to sleep
I only go to bed when these stings stop piercing my wrists
When they loose their hold - your tears evaporate.
Finally.. being laid down to rest, I fall into blankets of thought,
With only you on tap.
I will comfort you, like these blankets of thought have me doing to myself.
And I will comfort you to the bliss of your crying
So place your hands on this big black book,
And finger over the past years regret.
I felt the breeze pushing in, and the night taking day hostage.
Pushing the pages to a new section, not yet touched.
But the leaves are falling to the ground, and the grass is slowly dying.
Not a scent of summer would you let me wither past mother natures eyes
Just the annexation of fall, with less time remaining to wade in glory.
What did he do to make you cry this time?
All he has done is cast a shadow on your heart,
And now it has me thinking of what he said
For I have kept my feelings hidden,
And now I write them, on this unwritten page
I was too embarrassed to admit, I too - was once in love
And to let those words wither past my teeth was a sign of weakness.
Let the notes of the piano be touched by your grace of music
And the remix of this story, have you loving the way to recovery
The way the world turns its head in awkwardness
It's hard to say
But if I ever fall in love again,
I hope it will be back with you
Hypnotized by the thought of this choice
To stay, or go
To tell my feelings, or shun them away and close the door
I cough up blood
As I prepare in the anticipation of life.
My stomach churns and ties in knots.
Take these leaves of poison out of my soul
For in this foggy seduction
I'm trapped taken hostage by this body of mine.
Like a paraplegic - It is the silver bullet of life
And the black rose to death.
But for every beginning,
There is not always an end.

Poem by J.A.D. © 2002